December 11, 2016

‘Your desultory twenties,’ my mother calls my lost time, trying to make it sound reasonable and fun, but it started before I was twenty and lasted much longer.”

Jennifer Egan, The Goon Squad

I stumbled into my twenties. I wanted to extract all the syrupy sweetness that youth and the twenties has to offer. I did so hungrily and eagerly, as though I was tapping a maple tree for syrup. I made reckless, impulsive choices. In other words, I found out you can’t try to taste all that sweetness without tasting the bitter too, growing wary. You can’t become full if you’re always making yourself hollow.

A few weeks ago I finally marched into my thirties standing tall, albeit a bit bruised and weathered.

I am 30. Three-zero. The words rolling off my tongue feel unnatural. Strange. What does it mean to be a woman in the upper-Midwest without a husband, a family, a mortgage, a dog? What is it about people in thei...

Please reload

Recent Posts
Please reload

Please reload

© 2023 by EDUARD MILLER. Proudly created with

  • w-facebook
  • Twitter Clean
  • w-youtube